12 lies you always hear on first dates
Going on a first date is like interviewing someone for a job. Half of what you hear is either embellished, modified, or a blatant lie. If you’ve been out with more than a handful of people, then some of these lines should sound familiar to you. But if not, consider yourself enlightened.
1. “I’m a simple guy.”
Yup, he’s just your average Joe who appreciates life’s simplest pleasures: a freshly ironed shirt, a cold beer on a summer evening, and the love of a good woman.
The truth: The only people who will insist that they are simple are the ones who are insecure about their angst, their emotions, and how other people perceive them. In other words, they’re complicated. A guy who is naturally down-to-earth and unpretentious would win you over by being himself, not by verbally persuading you that he’s a “chilled, easygoing dude.” Not that there’s anything wrong with guys who aren’t simple, but if you’re going to date someone who’s a little more high-maintenance, at least be with a guy who can acknowledge it.
2. “I hate playing games.”
Games like “hot and cold,” “we broke up but let’s be friends,” and “I’ll wait three days before calling a girl” are for amateurs. If he likes you, he’ll act on it. If he doesn’t, he’ll make it clear.
The truth: This person doesn’t hate playing games. He or she hates being played with. Chances are, if they have to bring up “games” on a first date, they’ve been burnt before and are dead set against it happening again. Telling you that they hate playing games also absolves them from the guilt of leading you on. If you get upset at him for not calling you after he said he would, then it’s your fault for not understanding that some people change their minds. If you get angry at him for “stringing you along” only to dump you after meeting someone better, well, you’re the psycho for falling in love with him when he clearly wasn’t ready to commit. He wasn’t the one playing games, you were the one over-analysing his actions.
3. “I’m just an old-fashioned guy/girl.”
This is exactly the type of person you’d want to bring home to your parents. She’s a domestic goddess who makes her noodles from scratch, who would rather read a book than go clubbing, and whose dream in life is to be a stay-at-home mum. And if your date is a guy, he’s a “man’s man” who drives a car, holds conservative family values, and can smoke Cuban cigars with your dad.
The truth: This person isn’t old-fashioned. He or she is a normal person playing up their traditional aspects to seem as inoffensive as possible. But honestly, who wants to date someone that’s boring and unrelatable? Your date’s got to have a weird streak. Praise that quality when it comes out so that he or she will feel more comfortable acting like a contemporary person.
4. “I LOVE the great outdoors!”
Rock-climbing? Water sports? Running up Bukit Timah Hill at five in the morning on a Sunday? BRING IT ON.
The truth: Well, of course there are people who love getting bitten by mosquitoes and being one with nature. But until your date is willing to rough it out in the jungle with you, “loving the great outdoors” probably means strolling through Gardens by the Bay beneath the safety of her UV-protective umbrella.