10. He’s considering a future with you

10. He’s considering a future with you

You’re a force to reckon with. It’s a good thing. Withdrawal is subconscious and puts an uncharacteristic spin on his emotions. Men don’t like spinning. They like things factual, logical, within reach and within alterable dimensions. A guy who feels his emotions intensify may want a “time out” to re-assess his feelings and determine if it’s purely hormonal or if it has a basis for a future together. Real men aren’t scared of love. But be forewarned, you can tempt someone to warm your bed but you can never force them to love you or commit to you.  

So how do you survive this?
The trick is to keep breathing. When a guy pulls away, you must, too. Don’t make it about him. Make it about you. Is this what you really want? Half in, half out - sounds like a big anti climax and hardly a real relationship! Will he make you happy, be a parent you admire? Or, is this just his personality? Will he still choose you when you’re old and grey? Why live life with someone who says he’ll call but doesn’t, who disappears without reason and doesn’t want time with you?

But men do disappear. It’s in their DNA and is a path of least resistance - no confrontation, no drama. Wussy but true! But don’t be fooled. They go after what they want and zero contact is not an option. No sickness or high water will prevent him from seeing you. He won’t cancel plans and choose everything (and everyone) over you. If he makes an unparalleled effort to stay apart, plays poker face, insists he loves you but doesn’t feel “exactly the same way you do” then do a code black – vanish on him. No more tears, no more begging, no more fights. If he heads for the door, open it. He’s on earth to make someone happy, but it’s not you. Who needs love like that?  

Karen Khng is Managing Director of Love Script International. Find Love Script at www.love-script.com or info@love-script.com